charmedrolereversal.myfastforum.org

Es · Joined: 08 Nov 2007 Posts: 1

I just finished reading the first episode, the last episode and the Epilogue.

I could tell that you've got yourself a fantastic idea here and planned it out very well and wrote it very realisitically. Only one part wasn't. Stuart and Alyssa were SOOO barfy and SOOOO unrealistic that I simply can't read any more of it. And that's such a shame because otherwise it could've been SOOO good.

No way the real Alyssa Milano would act like that! You also could've/should've had more fun with the fact that *she* was dating Brian at the time that this takes place... In fact had you let BRIAN come with them, with Brian becoming LEO, it *really* could've been fun. *Also* there's the fact that Holly was already going out with David....

I can also tell that you've read too much of Shannen's bad publicity. I don't think *she* would've acted like that either.

I wish you would rewrite it with just the actresses going to the altered world or the actresses and Brian, not Stuart or any other fan. Letting *them* figure out what is going on; letting *them* do as they did but without Stuart would've made it SOOO much more realistic and so much more fun.

If you ever decide to do that, I hope you have Andrea post the link to the new version at thecharmedones.com (that's where I found the link), because I'd love to read that. Just don't give any of the girls a lover--you write falling in love too unrealisitcally and much too barfy. Stick with drama, not romance. That's what you do so well.

jtrey · Joined: 23 Sep 2008 Posts: 1